The Bog of Eternal Stench Dispute

(A camera lets us view a scenic spot near the Bog Of Eternal Stench. Slowly, a newswoman with a gas mask on walks up to the camera.)


Cathleen:
 Good evening. I am Cathleen O'Kaed reporting for the GBC. I am sure you have heard lately of the land dispute over the Bog Of Eternal Stench. The Goblin City has become grossly overpopulated during the last ten years, and critics are shouting for reform. This reform would turn our famous Bog into three main parts. To explain, we have the Wiseman with us.


Wiseman:

 Yes, the first part (closest to the city), would be landscaped into a city park, if they had their way, so that the neighboring goblins have a safe place for their children to get into trouble. The second part would have the bog itself drained!

Cathleen:
 And what is that for?


Wiseman:

 So that low-rent housing could be constructed. Like anyone even pays...

Cathleen:
 Interesting. Now tell me, Mister Wiseman, what would be done with the bog water which was drained??


Wiseman:

 The landscaping idiots would have it added to the final area of the bog, so that it can be used for profit.

Cathleen:
 I'm not quite sure I follow...?


Wiseman:

 Well, entrepreneurs think that many goblins would love to buy Bog-scented perfumes.

Cathleen:
 How do you feel about this arrangement?


Wiseman:

I am appalled! The Bog has been part of the Labyrinth for centuries! It is a reminder of that idio- er, our king, Jareth.

Cathleen:
 Thank you for you input. With us, we also have of the contractors responsible for this idea. Mr. Sneesh.


Sneesh:

We put wall around bogybog, make park, make houses, make big bogybog. Ah-Hahahaha!

Cathleen:
 Um.. yes.. about the perfumes-


Sneesh:

Guygoblins smelly stuff- "BOES" ah-ha, girlygoblins- "Ode of Eternal Stench" ah-hahaha!!

Cathleen:
 (looks straight into the camera, trying to get the moron out of the picture) Uh.. yes.. well.. Since the Goblin King himself will not answer our calls, our last interview will be Sir Didymus, a pillar of the Bog community. Sir Didymus, How does the Bog affect those who live around it? Doesn't the smell become over powering?


Didymus:

Smell? Of What Speakest Thou? The Air Is Sweet and Fresh! The Bog Of Eternal Stench, Although I Haven't An Idea As To Why They Call It So, It Is A Beautiful Wooded Area, Full of Flora And Fauna Needing The Protection Of A Noble Knight.

Cathleen:
 And what do you think about the idea to split up the Bog?


Didymus:

As Long As This Part Becomes The Park, I Havest No Objections.

Cathleen:
 Thank you for your time sir Didym--


Didymus:

(running into the distance) Halt! Halt I Say! No One May Cross Yonder Rocks Without Mine Permission!

Cathleen:

I will update you as the information breaks. This was Cathleen O'Kaed reporting for GBC, channel 13.
 
 

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Last updated February 9, 2001.